J.A. Kazimer

Serial Murdering is My Business and Business is So-So

Uncategorized

Yesterday, PW had an article about Amazon pulling an eBook memoir of the infamous serial killer, Robert Pickton, who is convicted of killing six women in B.C and might be responsible for at least 40 more. The book was transcribed from Pickton’s own words by his cellmate. The retailer pulled the book, published by Outskirt 38661-v2-197xPress, here in CO and a total vanity press, after an online petition surfaced. The publisher has since stopped publishing the work 

Now I am in no way condoning his actions. In fact, as far as I’m concerned he should spend his days tortured by the faces of the dead. 

However, I do wonder about the ability to pull a book of the e-shelves due to who writes it or it’s content. Are we setting a continued bad precedence of banning books we as a society deem too much? Then again, should this bastard benefit in any way from his murders? 

Amazon has every right to rid their shelves of anything. It’s a retailers prerogative. 

I also as a reader have every right to decide for myself what to read and what not to. And trust me, his book is on my NOT list.

Do I have any answers? Nope. Just questions. Getting older is hell. You start seeing more gray than black and white. 

What is Your Writing Worth?

Uncategorized

Recently there’s been a hub-bub in the writer world about Huff Post and their stance on paying writers. Which basically is, hell no, why should we pay you? You’re getting exposure, isn’t that enough you greedy pricks?

I might be paraphrasing.

So the question becomes, how much is your writing worth?

I have books that have sold very poorly. I’m talking not enough for a Happy Meal, so I have to settle for the Sad one. FYI, it comes with apples.

I have books that have sold fairly well. I’m talking KFC family meal money.

I write for the RMFW blog. They don’t pay me.  I also have stories on amazon for free or for real cheap (AKA $0.99).

I get exposure. Meaning I understand it. Not that I get a lot of it. Which is my own doing as I think writing for free for the Huff Post is a joke. It’s all about their attitude toward writers. Toward the people who give them content.

Anyone every heard of don’t shit where you eat? Without writers Huff Post would be a lame bunch of videos about cats. Who wants to watch that for 8 hours a day?

Really the choice is yours, dear reader. Write for free. Don’t write for free.

Expose yourself.

Um, or don’t. It’s probably not a great idea. You’ll get arrested and then try to blame me for telling you to do so.

 

Free Dope. Sick. Love.

Uncategorized

DSL - girl

Dear DEA/police enforcement offical, this is a book, not an offer for illicit drugs.
Yes, I live in Colorado. But we’re not all drug dealers, legal or otherwise.
Or are we?
Anyway, today only (12/14/15) I am giving away copies of a limited edition of Dope. Sick. Love.

 

Dope. Sick. Love.

Colin Wilde lies dying on a dirty bathroom floor, a needle in his arm and the name of his murdered wife on his bluish lips.

Two years later, struggling to stay clean, Colin meets Zoe, a woman with ties to his past. A past he can’t escape. Determined to make a comeback he soon becomes embroiled in a world of sex, drugs and murder.

Least Helpful Article Ever

Uncategorized

Recently I read an article with the title:

Want to Succeed in Self-Publishing? Have a Plan: Tips from an Indie Author

Seems like it would be a good article to read. Tips and all.

Um, don’t bother checking it out. No, really. DON’T CLICK THE LINK.

Damn it, why did you click it?

Fine, now that you actually believe me, let’s talk tips. Those are those things that help indie writers succeed in self-publishing like the article promised. Yes, you should write well. But you also need to write often. Like 4-10 books a year. Compared to my 2 if I’m lucky.

Okay, videos are fine. But reading is fundamental. There is plenty of info on self-publishing you can skim rather than take 2 mins to watch.

Have a plan…ummm okay. Did you really just tell us to look for one on the internet? Sure there are a ton, but you need one for your own niche. Something that will make you standout.

Am I wrong? Is there more to the article? If not, I really have to query publishers Weekly…

Because I Care. No, Really. I Do.

Uncategorized

2di5mgfSo yeah, I like you. Kind of. If you stop doing that with your face…

In honor of my semi-warm feelings for you. Only you. I am giving away A Very F***ed-Up Christmas Tale today only. Yep, a free book. Stop rolling your eyes. It’s a good one. I swear.

A Very F-Up Christmas TalePick up your kindle copy today or use my contact page if you need a .pdf version.

 

From the author of CURSES! comes a very f***ed-up version of the Dicken’s classic, A Christmas Carol. 
She’s not your fairy godmother’s Scrooge.
And this ain’t no wonderful life.

On Christmas Eve, Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, plotting the murder of yet another husband, when along came a spirit with some bad news–tonight she will be visited by three ghosts.

According to the spirit, Miss Muffet, VP of Dastardly Deeds at New Never City’s Villainous Union, must change her fiendish ways or else suffer a fate worse than curdled curds. As the bell tolls one, she begins her journey through her wicked past as a very short orphan, her depraved present, and a future terrifying enough to make her toss her gingerbread cookies.

Can she change? Better yet, will she?

Ready for Some Romance?

Uncategorized

assassins_heart_300The Assassin’t Series

The Assassin’t Heart (Book 1) – Out now

Top Pick by RT Book Reviews for Romantic Suspense

When CIA assassin Hannah Winslow mistakenly kills the wrong man, she vows never to take another life. Unfortunately Hannah’s superiors believe the killing was intentional. Now Hannah is the target. Hannah always knew it might come to this. Surprising her colleagues, she manages to disappear completely into a new, screamingly dull life, assuming a fake identity, shacking up with an overweight cat, and starting a new career as an ad executive.

Hannah’s past finally catches up with her at a company retreat in Hawaii, where her former partner Benjamin Miller has tracked her down. Is it a coincidence that assassination attempts on her life are now as common as rum, suntan lotion, and tiny umbrella drinks? What is the real reason for Ben’s presence? Will he be her savior or her assassin?
Kazimer’s debut romantic suspense deserves a spot at the top of the genre. Not only is this novel sassy and fun, but the author’s research into the CIA and the life of an assassin is reflected in her work, making it not just a fabulous romantic suspense tale, but a fantastic work of fiction, period. Hannah “Six” Winslow stands strongly on her own and has none of the characteristics of a damsel in distress — which makes this novel that much hotter and sensual.
       – Sarah Eisenbraun, RT Book Review

I started reading this and didn’t put it down till I was done. THE ASSASSIN’S HEART has mystery, intrigue, excitement and romance. It’s a fast paced story that is great for an afternoon with time to read.
      – Shellie Surles, Fresh Fiction

Ms. Kazimer weaves a great tale and the reader will get thoroughly engrossed in the storyline. The characters are all well developed, and the edge of your seat suspense pulls the reader in.
      -Lindy Gomez, A Bookish Escape Blog

The Assassin’s Kiss  (Book 2) – Forthcoming

The Assassin’t Date: A Prequel Novella –  Forthcoming

A Very F***ed-Up Situation

Home, Uncategorized

Here’s the deal. I am oLSVL_Library_11-19-15_Self_Publishing_Paneln a panel at the Louisville Library tonight. —>

Which is awesome. It should be fun and educational. I love hearing the experience of other writers about publishing.

The thing that bothers me is the flyer for the panel. ——>

Again using a near swear word has affected my career (yes, I get that it’s my own fault for using it).

The library felt that my book cover, of my latest self-published work (A A Very F-Up Christmas TaleVery F***ed-Up Christmas Tale) wasn’t and isn’t appropriate for the flyer.
Now I see their point. Kids and F-words after all. But this is a panel on self-publishing, and what cover do they deem appropriate? The Assassin’s Heart, which is traditionally published, not self-published like the panel presentations/representatives.assassins_heart_300

So how do I feel about it? Four years ago, I would’ve been up in arms. But now, I’ve had it happen so often, it’s a minor irritation. And this makes me the maddest.

Therefore, FUCKKKKKKK!!!!! Fuckity, fuck.

Okay, I feel better. Game on.